Out of The Darkness
I was raised in a pagan home. We didn’t speak of Jesus. We would perform rituals and sacrifices that led me to use drugs, like hallucinogens and hashish. It was horrible. I was going to school high. Depression, loneliness, fear—drugs were taking over, so I began to sell them. I was in and out of jail five or six times before I finally ended up going for extended periods of time. I could feel my life turning into disaster. My heart was hardened because of what I was doing.
Into a New Beginning
There was a teacher in the jail where I was, and her name was Ms. Diane McGee. She is the one who taught me about God and continued to teach me about Him, showing me all the stuff in the Bible. Something inside of my mind and my heart opened up that I was like, “Hey, I really, really need to listen to this!” It just kind of clicked, and then I realized: I have to know more. After all the years that I had been deprived from this and didn’t know anything about it, I just wanted to know everything I could.
She just started showing me more and more of the Bible. Eventually, after a few times, I was asked, “What do I have to do to be saved?” I could feel all the darkness leaving my body. After that, I got out, and I did good for a good little bit. I was actually back on a sober lifestyle. And that’s whenever my parents died, and that was like a complete breaking point.
I completely blamed God. I turned away from Him, denied Him, and did not want to live for Him anymore. One day, I was at my house, and there was a Bible on the table. I went to the bathroom, I came back out, and the Bible was on Psalm 23. This was the exact psalm that was at my Mom’s funeral just a couple of days before. And then I was like, “Am I going crazy? Did I leave this open?” Then I realized: No, this is a sign from God saying, “I’m not ever going to leave you.”
Instantly at that point, I fell down on to my knees and prayed to Him and asked Him to please forgive me for not turning to Him when I needed Him in my time of need. And now I have an intimate and very personal relationship with God.
The Church at West Franklin was brought to me by Karen Miller. She actually offered to take me to church. I was looking for a church family, but had never been part of one. So I said yes. I had never been in a church before, so I was a little nervous. But then, as soon as I stepped in there, though, it was like all of that was lifted. All I can really say is the church is my family. Every time I walk in there, I get that fuzzy feeling like whenever you’re with your family and you’re so happy and full of joy. That’s what the church gives me. They’re giving me that love and support. They’re giving me everything that I could possibly need.
Earlier this month, I actually had the opportunity to get baptized. It was probably the most amazing moment of my life. I loved getting dunked in the water, and I loved coming back up. I felt rejuvenated and like a whole new woman. And I couldn’t quit smiling. I view God now as my comforter and my rock. He has given His blood to resurrect me every single day. He’s everything.